I listen to radio shows; I read; I meet with successful people; I am always amazed that the most successful people are often people who endure tremendous difficulties and they persist through the tough times on their success path. I think that the struggles that we endure are an important part of our learning and development. I heard a story today about a woman, Sara, who was part of a large family living somewhere on the east coast. Sara was a teacher and she quit her job to help her mother in her last years of life. She spent every day caring for her mom and talking to her. She learned so much about her mom and became much closer than ever before. Unfortunately this care giving woman received no help or support from her siblings and spent all her savings, time, and energy caring for her mother for four years until her mom’s death. The story didn’t end there though. It turned out that a wealthy family friend was aware of this woman’s selfless act of caring for her mother, depleting her assets, and all the while her family was neglecting Sara and her mother. This friend not only purchased a nice house near the water for Sara (this was a long time dream for her) but he also provided a significant endowment to be used to rebuild her life and get back into teaching. In my book, Sara was successful as she was depleting her money and helping her mom. In this case, she was rewarded in the end, but so many people do selfless acts like this without the payoff in the end. They are successful too, but they don’t have the house and bank account to show for it. I hope that if you ever get the chance to help one of these people, that you make the best of it. This is a good example of “paying it forward”. If you are unfamiliar with that term, look for the movie by the same name.
Today I am writing a little piece about the Jesus connection to LifeSuccess.com and what it means to me. First, I would like to say that regardless of your religious convictions or lack thereof, Jesus is arguably one of the most important historical figures in the world. He is also one of the most misunderstood, misquoted, and maligned not because of his actions, but because of people who are sometimes overzealous and sometimes just plain stupid. When Jesus walked the earth, he was the best example of humility, generosity, and wisdom that I could ever imagine. He was not condemning or judgmental but rather, he was a humble teacher who lead by example and accepted all people into his care. There have been other great examples throughout history of selfless people who lived to help others, but Jesus was a very special case. I happen to believe that Jesus did have a divine connection, but even if you don’t believe in that connection, you can learn from his example as a human. If nothing else, Jesus deserves your investigation. Look for historical documentation on his life and teachings and decide for yourself just where his example can make a difference in your life.
There is a time for work and a time for play and a time for everything else. How common it is to hear “I just don’t have enough time” when the reality is that we just don’t use our time as carefully as we should. This segment is not about time effectiveness though. It is about finding peace in the time that we have. Knowing that time ticks away regardless of whether or not we are effectively using our time is both a blessing and a curse. We find peace in time when we realize that time is beyond our control and we can only control our behavior and use of our available time. If we listen to the small quiet voice of life and wisdom within us, we know what we are supposed to be doing. If we can confidently say that we are doing the things that are most important, then whether we finish our tasks or not, we can enjoy peace in knowing that we were doing the right thing.
This may be the most difficult thing to release on our way to success. As a protection mechanism, we remember the things that hurt us. When we are children and we put our hand on a hot stove, we learn our lesson and avoid the hot stove in the future. As adults, we have many hurts that have shaped our beliefs and attitudes and some of those hurts can now be successfully avoided. Pay close attention to the limits that you place on yourself as a result of past pain and you might find that some of them are now unnecessary. Even worse, some of our behavior as a result of past experience becomes a roadblock for future success. Letting go of the past includes all the other “letting go” activities in this series and allows us to refresh and renew our spirits for positive activities in the present (which is the only time period that we actively control). So let go of the past and begin living this moment with a clear mind and a positive spirit. It will make a positive difference in your life.
Sometimes the way with think is just as limiting as bad habits. In fact, if we get into the habit of acting without thinking, then we are not only limiting our physical performance, but we are also limiting our creative imagination. If you find yourself feeling negatively opinionated about something, but you don’t really remember why, then you might need to let go of a negative mindset in order to benefit from something new. You may have had a negative experience with a particular item in the past and without thinking, you avoid any new products made by the same company. In fact, your dissatisfaction may have been the one in a million defects in an otherwise great product. Before you make decisions, remember to clear your mind of old and possibly inaccurate baggage and evaluate the decision based on current and relevant information. You may find a new favorite in a previously avoided company or product. Clear your experience baggage and make good decisions.
We get old and die, and unfortunately some of us die before we get old which is usually tough to handle. Some friends of mine recently lost their six year old son who was always healthy. He had a brain aneurism and died within minutes. There is no way to explain how these things happen, but they do and we all have to learn how to let go and move on. I don’t mean to sound insensitive, and I have lost family members too, but the sooner we can come to terms with our losses, the better off we are (and everyone around us too). When we lose loved ones (and we surely will), we should do our best to honor them with our lives and dedicate our behavior to their memory. Life is short so make the best of it while you are here, and let those we lose along the way remind us that each moment is precious and should be treasured. Be thankful for life today.
It’s true that old habits die hard, but sometimes we really need to release some of our limiting habits in order to grow and reach our potential. The easiest way to identify these habits is to pay close attention to our activities during the day and jot a note down when we find ourselves doing something that has become a habit, but adds little or nothing to our well being. Habits can be quite simple such as reaching for a soda for breakfast or they can be complex such as a grooming routine before we leave home. Some habits are necessary activities that we do while on “autopilot” and actually improve our day by freeing up time to think, but other habits are just a waste of time. Since we only have twenty four hours to work with every day, it would be in our best interest to eliminate the useless habit activities and replace them with any number of positive and self improving habits. Stay positive and make it a great day!
This is the first in a series of writings on letting go. Today, I’m writing about letting go of children as they grow up and move on to college, work, or wherever life takes them. The fall marks the beginning of a new school year while work and other adventures may happen at any time, but the feelings for all involved can be intense and emotional regardless of the time of year. Parents are charged with the responsibility of raising children to be self sufficient and the first test of this self sufficiency can be a great challenge for all. For parents, the action is similar to those found in nature such as birds pushing their young out of the nest with the confidence that they will fly. Humans may find this activity less instinctive and therefore more difficult, but it should be done for the well-being of all involved. Parents need to know that they have done their job, and children need to know how to “fly”. Although this letting go is a biggie for most, it can also be most rewarding and satisfying so move into a new phase of life with confidence and with a happy heart.
I was chatting online with two of my favorite fellow sailors today and the subject of inspiration came up. Where do I find the inspiration for this blog? I find it in the amazing, interesting, and wonderful people whom I have chosen to spend my time with. I also find inspiration in books and blogs and in nature. If we spend just a little time appreciating the great people and things around us, we will find all the inspiration that we need to think and to dream about and then to do awesome things. Surround yourself with the people, books, and environment that will allow your mind to open and soar. Inspiration is there and the fruits of that inspiration can be beautiful. Thank you to Buford and Denise for inspiring today’s thoughts. They have been my sailing buddies, friends in music, and source of much inspiration since we met. I wish you all good friends, good music, and all the things that help to make your life great.
Most of us have musical preferences and they often reflect our personalities. Sometimes they are influenced by peer groups, family, and friends and sometimes we listen to different music depending on our state of mind or feelings at the moment. Have you ever been truly moved by a musical piece to the point that it ignites an inner emotion or brings tears to your eyes. Music and sound have strong healing (and potentially disruptive) capabilities and we should attempt to understand this phenomenon better. Dr. Andrew Weil has developed a sound program for healing and maintaining a positive life vibration that I enjoy listening to, and many others have used music and sound for calming, learning, and other uses. I suggest that you pay attention to the music that you enjoy and better understand just how it affects your mind and body. You might be surprised.
